Constant Conversation

I’m having a neverending discussion with God.  I’m always talking to Him.  I always have been.  He doesn’t always feel the need to respond which is okay and I realize He’s terribly busy.   And I think it’s quite possible that I’ve lessened how often I talk now — well, because I’ve done that on a whole with… everyone lately.   Practicing my silence.

But this week my spirits have been pretty low.  I’m overrun with stuff to do for NARC.  I’m overwhelmed with sadness about work.  I’m generally tired all the time and there are tears on the crest of my lids daily.  I mentioned it to someone in passing and she said “prayer helps — turn it over to God and let it go.”

My immediate thought upon her saying that was…. “i’m not sure if I remember how to actively pray.”   And does that count as something different than this talk we have all the time on and off?    I need to find Him again for sure in a real way.  I simply don’t know where to begin.  It’s hard to believe I’ve lost sight of Him when I know I actively depend on Him for so much.

I must find my way.

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